I Am A New Person
Remembering those broken hearts and the aching even as far back where my parents would talk and I would talk back tearing them apart.
Being blinded by the material things that made me , but just because you look wealthy doesn't mean inside of you is healthy .
So amazing how I used to push aside my feelings and forget who I was just so that I can please those that surround me.
Hiding my true identity ain't easy but it sure had me dizzy,split personalities but as I looked back I realize it was just the demons trying to kill me.
Conditioning my mind and my body to the pain that i felt, telling my inner being that all this isn't real , so my heart started to get frozen because if the pain don't hurt then the ice can't be broken.
Don't get numb because this is dumb though being broken can really be a burden but in those days I would harden my heart and pain feared me.
Trying to gain street respect from those around me so amazing how ladies were all after me and they didn't see anything wrong with all what that was going on inside me.
They made me feel superior because to them a guy who doesn't feel pain or shed a tear is strong but they were so wrong because real men are those who can be open or burst out in tears because they are not cold but rather feel the pain to be made broken.
Looking back at how much I tried to kill myself but I was afraid to die because I didn't know exactly who my soul would fly to at least I have a thought to give thanks to because Joel bro if you were dead then who would you write to?
Just looking back pondering on my past, its crazy how I've gotten through , God's love is amazing and has changed me to the point where it remade me .
Transformed and now i have been reborn not physically but spiritually.
I know it has been revealed to me because everyone has seen the changed in me. I am a living testimony that God is real .
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